Take a break and laugh, tell a joke and have fun this weekend

Tell a few one liners, offend everyone and then laugh!!!

• Sometimes I wake up grumpy, other times I let him sleep!
• Familiarity breeds children.
• Laugh alone and the word thinks you are an idiot.
• The light at the end of the tunnel is a freight train.
• Why do blondes like lightning? They think someone is taking their picture.
• Why did the Aggie stay up all night studying? He had a urine test in the morning!
• Have you heard about the Aggie who has an average IQ? Neither have we.
• Confucius say, "He who runs behind bus, gets exhausted."
• Ever stop to think and then forget to start again?
• How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry him.
• What do you call a man who is lucky in love? A bachelor.
• How many social workers does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change. (dumb!)
• Why do you bury a lawyer 10 feet underground? Because deep down they are really nice people!
• Why did the Post Office have to recall the new Politican stamp? Because people didn't know which side to spit on.
• What do you do if you run over a politician? Put it in reverse.


• And finally...What do you call a cross between a politician and a boomerang? A nasty smell you can't get rid of!!!!